January 2010 started off with a bang for the fatties, and I’m not just talking about Mo’Nique’s Golden Globe win and the semi-scandal over her hairy legs. Because of V Magazine’s wonderful size issue that featured fashion spreads with plus-size models, there was a slew of media (and not just blogs!) discussions about the unrealistic sizes portrayed in the fashion world. Despite the attention being given to the curvier models, it is shame that the fashion industry still considers a size 12 a plus-size.
First Lady Michelle Obama, my personal hero and working mother icon, is heading up a new National Obesity Movement, which will be a multi-layed initiative aimed at making school lunches healthier; giving children more opportunities to be active (Does this mean we’re tossing out this ridiculously handled No Child Left Behind initiative which has left no time for gym and only focuses on teaching children to past the statewide tests?); ensuring that health food is available in all communities; and giving families better nutritional information so they can make better food choices. Hmmmm? I like the ideas presented but I really dislike the name. National Obesity Movement, because it could be used negatively against any chubby to obese person. It also continues the false impression that those who are thin or within their “normal” weight ranges are healthy. This is not accurate. It feels as though this is going to turn into another fatty vs. skinny battle. I would appreciate this movement more if this were called a National Health Movement or a Healthy Living Movement, because it would be more inclusive. I don’t think Americans need yet something else to divide us.
Tyra Banks, with all her flaws, has always been a warrior for building up girls’ self-esteem. Recently, the daytime talk princess has launched a plus-size teen modeling contest. Tyra’s Fiercely Real Teen Model Search is open to girls ages 13 to 19, 5′9″ – 6′1″ tall, and size 12 through 20. I think it is a wonderful idea and girls need to see more body alternatives than what was presented at Sao Paulo’s fashion week.
Sigh! Those damn magazines are at again–giving us yet more proof that women should not compare themselves to women they see in the media! WWD reports that:
A KARDASHIAN REALITY: The new issue of OK magazine claims to have an exclusive on Kourtney Kardashian’s “body after baby,” but the package might not be as exclusive as the magazine proclaims — and Kardashian might not be as slim as she appears on its cover. The reality TV star contends she never spoke to OK for the cover story…. “They doctored and Photoshopped my body to make it look like I have already lost all the weight, which I have not,” Kardashian told WWD. She also spoke out to her Twitter followers: “One of those weeklies got it wrong again…they didn’t have an exclusive with me. And I gained 40 pounds while pregs, not 26…But thanks!” It also seems that OK has built the lower half of Kardashian’s body for its cover, as the original images were cropped at the belly. An OK spokesman declined comment. Just another dramatic day in the life of a Kardashian.
The most disturbing turn of fat events was all the attention being paid to Jennifer Aniston’s newer and seemingly more fuller figure, which was revealed at the Golden Globes. Ironically, the gossip and fashion rags always praised her “old” body as being slim and athletic but not disturbingly skinny. In other words, another body type we should envy and aspire to. Jen’s fuller and sexier bod was dubbed her “revenge body” by Life & Style magazine. It was pitting the curvier and now sexier Aniston against a now slimmer and seemingly tired looking Angelina Jolie. (I’m a mother of two with a part-time nanny, and I’m constantly exhausted. Can you imagine how hard it must be to have six kids and travel around the world as part of your job? You’d look tired too!) I hate this cooked up media war on so many levels. First off, Jennifer and Brad have been over for 5 years. Trust me, a man with six kids, a hot common-law wife, and an even hotter career doesn’t have time to sit around to pine about the ex he left. If he’s not seen with Angie and the kids, he’s usually seen palling around with George Clooney. (Do they ever look like they’re having a bad time? Ever?) And with her slew of boy toys, I’m sure Jennifer is is glad to be single and without kids. (Have you seen the studs she’s rumored to have been seeing? Bradley Cooper, Gerard Butler, Jon Mayer?)
Secondly, why is what a woman does with her body always have to do with a man? Again, where’s the stories about Gerard and Jon beefing up to impress Jennifer or Brad Pitt hitting the gym to keep Angelina from thinking about her first hubby? This sends the message that no matter how successful, confident or attractive a woman may be it means nothing if it isn’t to impress a man. Finally, I am just over the whole Angelina vs. Jennifer thing. Sure there is societal evidence that women from as young as preschoolers dabble in relational bullying against other girls, but it isn’t always the case and the media should really stop encouraging such behavior.
Filed in: Entertainment, Miscellanous
I apologize for taking so long with this post. It’s been a busy month. –Rakisha
5. So Called Pro Health Ads Insult: In September, New York City Health Department unveiled a series of ads warning New Yorkers of the health perils of drinking too much soda and other sugary beverages. Eating balanced meals and exercising every for at least 20 minutes a 5 times a week is the ideal for maintaining a healthy body. (Repeat after me, Being Fat or Overweight Doesn’t Mean You’re Unhealthy! There are skinny unhealthy people, by the way.) We all know this to be true, but there’s no need to force it down our throats with such disgusting ads. Take a look below.
Finally, in an effort to beat people to a bloody pulp encourage people to become vegetarians, PETA posts a billboard in Florida that calls overweight women as “whales.” Besides being blatantly offensive to overweight women and men, it yet again reinforces the idea that women are just pieces of inanimate slabs of meat to be controlled or harangued or manipulated by society and advertisers into conforming to an ideal standard of beauty.
PETA's Now Infamous Ad
4. The DD Boob Tube: Some fat folks couldn’t decide if the sudden spike in fatties on TV during the summer was a plus or a negative. This year we saw a Dancing with the Stars and The Biggest Loser combo called “Dance Your Ass Off” hosted by DWTS alum and Tony award winner Marissa Jaret Winokur. (A show that I enjoyed the few times I saw it although I was always afraid that Marissa’s girdle was going to explode.) We saw the plus-sized version of The Bachelor, More to Love, which was even more repulsive because their were fat girl dating stereotypes abound. Finally, there was Lifetime’s hit dramedy Drop Dead Diva, which featured a size 16 lead character. Unfortunately, the issue of her weight came up a lot. (But DDD has won me over because of breakout star’s Brooke Elliott wonderful acting, and is pro-woman and sisterhood. It also carries the message of that people need to stop judging people from their looks and judge them on their insides.)
3. Glamour Mag Pushes the Fat Agenda: In the September issue of Glamour magazine, there was a naked plus-sized model named Lizzie Miller that sent a shock wave through overweight, fat, chubby, chunky, flabby American women everywhere. Why? Because Lizzie was sitting naked, smiling, and looking beautiful all the while having belly overhang. To follow up on the huge amount of publicity, Glamour magazine featured a spread of seven naked plus-size models in their November 2009 issue. On the flip side, in its September issue, Self magazine doctored cover girl Kelly Clarkson’s picture by shaving at least 20 pounds off her curvy frame.
2. Is She Too Fat to Be Our Health Advocate?: Dr. Regina Benjamin is nation’s new Surgeon General. This accomplished physician was the first African-American woman selected to be on the American Medical Associations’ board of trustees and is health advocate for the poor and for women’s rights. According to the pundits and talking heads at Fox News, Dr. Benjamin is obese and thus unfit to be the United States’ head doc.
1. Riding the Fat Wave to the Oscars: The movie Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire has become the breakout indie movie of the year. Besides the controversial subject matter about a morbidly obese teen being sexually abused by both her mother and father, the movie has been receiving big time buzz for its two leading ladies. There’s plus-size advocate and funny woman, Mo’Nique, who not only debuted her late-night talk show on BET this fall but has been nominated for a Golden Globe nomination. Big screen newcomer Gabourey Sidibe, who plays the lead character, has tons of confidence and has shown to be unapologetic about her weight in interviews. She has also been nominated for a Golden Globe for best actress. Wins in those fields almost guarantees wins at the Oscar. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to see someone big, proud, beautiful and different looking receive the award? Good luck ladies!
Filed in: Miscellanous
*SIGH*
Last week, I went to see my doctor about a follow-up to a blood test I had gotten in December. I went to see my general physician, because I was feeling a general physical and mental malaise as well having zero sex drive. Although I am a diagnosed depressive and am on anti-depressants, I never had a drop in my sex drive like the one I was experiencing. My doctor thought it could be a thyroid condition, so he took blood and urine. I wasn’t that worried because all my blood tests usually come back normal…. Until January 6, 2010
There was glucose in my urine. My sugar levels in my blood were high. My A1c test number was 6.5— rising to a worrisome level. My liver functioning test was slightly abnormal, and my trigylceride numbers were high. (The liver and trigylceride numbers being high was new, because I’ve always had EXCELLENT cholesterol and fat levels despite my weight.) Although my risk factors had always been high–overweight, African-American woman, gestational diabetes, relatives who are diabetic, the blood tests never showed that I was so close to the edge of being a Type 2 diabetic until now. I’m not joking when I say that I am one cookie inhalation from having full-blown Type 2 Diabetes.
I’ve always been a proponent that one can be fat/overweight/obese and still healthy despite what the media shovels to the public. I had been living proof, and there were thousands of others who were doing it too. Now, I’m not fat and healthy. I have to lose weight so I can be healthy. I feel like I’ve let my pro-Fat brethen down. I’m now the stereotype. I’m now the target of people who believe that their tax dollars support people’s unhealthy lifestyles (like overweight people don’t pay taxes). But I’m not a whiner nor a hypocrite nor a quitter! I’m fighting to get my healthy and fat status back. Type 2 Diabetes will not get me!
After I absorbed everything he said, I looked my doctor straight in the eyes and said “I’ll give you better eating, less carbs, and at least 2 days a week of exercise. What else can you suggest? Supplements, herbs? What? Because I’m not going to spend the rest of my life pricking my fingers.” He said exercise, diet, and a medication called Metformin.
“Metformin is used with a proper diet and exercise program to control high blood sugar in people with type 2 diabetes (non-insulin-dependent diabetes). Controlling high blood sugar helps prevent kidney damage, blindness, nerve problems, loss of limbs, and sexual function problems.”
So, here I am 5 days later. I’m on WeightWatchers. I worked out twice already, and plan on adding a third day this upcoming Wednesday. I’ve gotten past the side effects of Metformin already. I’m feeling empowered by my proactivity. I could have been paralyzed by anxiety or self-pity or any other low self-esteem traits.
If it weren’t for my chronic condition (I’m an asthmatic), I wouldn’t have been seeing a doctor regularly because I know the horrors first hand of dealing with someone in the medical field who can’t see past your weight (or gender or race). I also know many may Fat Advocates feel, like I originally did, that somehow losing weight is a betrayl of principles. It’s not. Losing weight for health reasons doesn’t mean you suddenly have to get “skinny.” Check out below.
“We have seen a consistent pattern in our weight loss studies that when patients lose 5%-10% of their body weight, they lower blood pressure, reduce LDL ["bad"] cholesterol, improve glucose tolerance, and in general, lower the risk for cardiovascular disease,” says Catherine Champagne, a researcher with Louisiana State University’s Pennington Biomedical Research Center.
This excites me, because I know soon I will be able to spit in the eye of convention again and be fat and healthy!
http://www.newsweek.com/id/213807
Filed in: Miscellanous, Plus-Size, Self-Esteem & Self-Help
We all have seen what little girls with low self-esteem grow up to become–plastic surgeon addicts, promiscuous, drug or alcohol abusers, or medicated depressives. I have low self-esteem and I am a medicated depressive, but years of therapy have yet determined which came first–the depression or the low self-esteem. I was not showered with praise as a child for my looks or my talents, and my health and my weight (no correlation between weight and health) were more of an issue than anything else for my family. (As a child I had chronic Asthma and was painfully thin and frail.) My mother, who didn’t live with me, encouraged my long held desire to be a writer and my brother’s desire to be an artist. My grandmother, whom we lived with, thought they were good hobbies, but encouraged us to get practical work that paid the bills and had benefits. At 37-years-old, both my brother and I have “city” jobs.
When I became a mother for the first time, I made a conscious decision to praise all my daughter’s abilities and her looks. I promised myself I wouldn’t comment on her weight; call her hair nappy; or prevent her from pursuing a career or hobby that was perceived as just male-oriented. As much as I doubt my mothering abilities, I don’t think anyone can say that I don’t build my two daughters’ confidence in their abilities, smarts, and looks up on a near daily basis. Both my daughters, Dew and Jo-Jo, are being raised as feminist as possible.They both are going through a princess phase, and love their dolls and tiaras but every now and then they will play smash ‘em up with their trucks. Dew takes ballet, but loves the kung fu antics of Mulan. Jo-Jo’s favorite catchphrase is from a Barbie version of the Three Musketeers that’s on DVD. She’ll shout “Don’t mess with the dress,” before she pummels her pretend enemy.
Lately, my beautiful African-American children have been obsessed with Barbie and all of Disney’s “yellow-hair” princesses. They were dressed as Tinker Bell and Barbie for Halloween. When we read picture books together, they immediately point to the fairer-skinned characters and shout “that’s me!” This makes my and my husband’s skin crawl, but we avoid getting on our Black is Beautiful soapbox to lecture our preschoolers. We keep reminding ourselves that this is a phase, and gently remind our daughters that “everyone is beautiful no matter the color of their skin or hair. Everyone is beautiful no matter what they wear. We are all beautiful all day every day.” We think it is starting to sink in a bit, because our young Jo-Jo will reply “Everyone is beautiful” when I play to her “Do I look beautiful?” game after she gets dressed.
Despite the general acceptance of the Obama family, the United States’ representation of beauty is still pretty narrow-minded. (And, not to air Black folk’s dirty laundry, but our own representation of beauty is still pretty narrow-minded as well.) Because of this, it was very important to me that my daughters saw the new Disney princess movie The Princess and the Frog. The movie features Disney’s first African-American princess and black people of all hues from tan to chocolate. The movie also introduces an element of American culture that is distinctively Black– Jazz. I applaud Disney for making a multi-layered, culturally sensitive (albeit extremely subtly) movie with an African-American protagonist.
Mulan, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin and The Princess and the Frog (Frog) have strong women characters who eschew common beliefs about a woman’s place. All the young ladies weren’t yearning for a prince to rescue them, but a chance to live their lives as they saw fit in spite of society’s constraints. These movies are almost counter cultural if it weren’t for Disney’s incredibly girlie-girl marketing. Belle, from Beauty and the Beast, was an avid reader but do we see Belle book lamps and book marks flooding the shelves of Toys R Us? Or Mulan swords? At least the tea sets and serving sets that bear Tiana from the Frog’s likeness are appropriate, because she wants to open a restaurant.
Princess Tiana as a little girl with her parents
The Princess and the Frog is a good movie for little boys and girls of all races for it teachers the value of hard work, inner beauty, and teamwork. It is a good movie for my daughters because it gives them positive images of fat/fuller-figured people and a brown-skinned beauty to add to their growing repertoire of beauty. Basically, the movie gives them balance.
Disney Markets Black-Haired Beauties...Finally
Filed in: Entertainment, Miscellanous
Hey ya’ll (yes people from North of the Mason-Dixon line can say ya’ll), my mind is busy but my time is limited. When you have children and it is Christmastime, it is all about buying presents and hiding them! I apologize beacause I have some good topics in my head that I have yet committed to blog. Here is what I’m planning for the next month:
1. Part 2 of my Year in Fat which will include the new anti- soda commercial, the movie Precious, and Mo’Nique’s Golden Globe nomination;
2. A brief review of The Princess and the Frog, and why it was important for me to buy every piece of Princess Tiana merchandising for my daughters (also a look at the new more realistically shaped dolls);
and
3. My hair.
Have a Merry Christmas!
Filed in: Miscellanous
FAT GIRLS FLOAT is an independent documentary in which a 300lb. filmmaker Kira Nerusskaya takes the audience on a journey through international fat subculture, giving fat women from four counties an opportunity to have their say. Despite many glares, glances, and gloating from media, family members, medical communities and the public-at-large; fat women from four countries (England, France, Russia, and the United States) tell their tales of sorrow and success, wow and woe; discussing size discrimination, political activism (fat and size acceptance), and social networking communities. These fat women show how they need to rise above what the world thinks of them and point out their ability to overcome society’s condemnation through compassionate perseverance. In essence, fat girls float because they do not let their weight ‘weigh’ them down.
Filed in: Miscellanous
BEFORE
Beauty is hard to define, but it is one of those things that society knows when it sees it. However, in the United States of America, our society is so diverse it is hard to give one solid definition of beauty that every person can accept. As a Black woman raising two little girls in a culture where the beauty culture is still predominantly defined by white people, I am worried that I am unable to make them realize that their skin and hair is as beautiful as anyone else’s. Currently, this is really bothering me because my daughters are obsessed with Cinderella, Tinkerbell, and Barbie. My oldest daughter dressed as “yellow [hair]” Barbie for Halloween; the youngest dressed as Tinkerbell. Although they have brown-skinned Barbie dolls that they adore, I am still worried about what is going on in their little minds?
A Study on Beauty Standards
My youngest daughter is 2.5 years-old, and she loves Cinderella. Jo-Jo is now going through a phase where she doesn’t think she is beautiful or pretty unless she is wearing a dress and shiny “tap-tap” shoes. Even with constant reassurances of her intelligence AND beauty from since she was born, she will cry “I not beautiful” if she’s in pants. My oldest daughter is a little more reasonable, but also feels more beautiful in a dress. I don’t know if it is because they’re living out some type of princess fantasy or if they truly believe they’re ugly if they’re not dressed like a 12″ fashion doll. I try not to overreact, which is really hard since I am an over-reactor, because I don’t want them to think that this a big deal or create some type of neurosis. But, admittedly, I am sending mixing signals. I wear make-up and adore wearing sparkly accessories. I don’t feel less beautiful when I’m not made up or wearing my costume jewels, but it is obvious that I feel better when I do.
My daughters like to watch me get ready for work. They want to be like Mommy. If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, then I’m looking at 70-pounds of flattery every day. My oldest is more into my routine than my youngest, because I used to sit her on my bed and put on make-up before I got pregnant with her younger sister. At just 16-months, Dew would help me rub on my scented lotion. Dew, now 4, likes it when I allow her to wear bit of my lotion or perfume because they “smell beautiful like Mommy.” (Insert here me reassuring Dew that she smells beautiful even without Mommy’s lotions. She’ll chime in “you too, Mommy!”) Dew and Jo-Jo like to take the brushes and swirl it around their faces. They really like putting on lip gloss, and look forward to Mommy painting their toe nails. It’s hard to explain to them at this age that I like to this because it is like playing dress-up everyday, not because I’m not beautiful without it. They see it as part of being a grown up woman–something that has to be done when they’re adults.
There’s also the matter of hair. Black women have issues with their hair that has been passed down to their daughters like it was built into our genetic code. From the moment hair spouted on their heads, I’ve always brushed it while whispering the kind words that their hair was beautiful. Dew’s hair is thick, coarse, and can hold a style. Jo-Jo’s hair is thick, soft, and can’t hold a style. Some Black folks would call Jo-Jo’s hair “good hair,” because it is soft and can be combed with minimal effort. (I don’t let these folks speak that in front of my kids.) I am a natural hair woman. I’ve never had a chemical in my head to straighten it. My mom was adamant that she didn’t want me to have one. Besides the hot comb, the world of Black hair care was a near mystery to me. All I knew is that it required lots of products, trips to the beautician, and you shouldn’t admit to having a weave. (Well, back in 1986 it was still taboo.) In college, I learned a style that I could maintain that was natural, and I cut it off once I became a mom. Although the double strand twists that became my trademark was easy to maintain, it took a long time to do.
Recently, I tried to trim my medium-sized Afro and ended up bald (long story) and now I am wearing wig that mimics black, relaxed
AFTER: Getting Wiggy with It
& curled hair. My wearing a wig, or “pretend hair” as my daughters call it, has caused another level of stress for me. Dew, from what I intimated from her simple vocabulary, is upset by my bald head for it is more closely cropped than her father’s. This morning, I dared to go to the laundry mat in just a hat without the wig, and she freaked out.
After a firm yet sensitive Mommy-daughter chat, she revealed that my wig was “more fun” to look at and that I should wear it all of the time. Not wanting to upset her any further, I made her a promise that I would wear my wig whenever I go outside and a pretty scarf on my head whenever I was in the house so she wouldn’t have to see my head until the hair grew back. This made her happy. I was the “bestest” Mommy again, but I was also a disappointed Mommy on the inside. This could have been a prime time to introduce a conversation about the sin of vanity, and make a declaration to embrace my Capt. Picard ‘do in and out of the house by tossing down the wig. But, after weeks and weeks of trying to teach my girls that everyone is a beauty despite what is judged as acceptable, I ended up teaching them that you should cover up parts of yourself that may offend others’ sense of what is beautiful.
Filed in: Miscellanous
I am truly a product of the pop culture I ingest and the former industry I used to inhabit, so the calendar year is never complete without a year in review story running in November! 
I‘ve been racking my brains, and scanning the internet for some of the biggest FAT stories of 2009. The last 11 months have been rife with them. Luckily, the internet remembers things my 37-year-old brain forgot. (I should really be lucky, because some of those news items would still be making me furious if I continued to remember them everyday.) So, let’s try not to turn into a pillar of salt as we take a look over our shoulders and examine the Year in Fat!
10. Figure magazine folds. Just another print mag dedicated to the big girls to throw in the recycling bin. *Blech* Vogue’s after-school special “shape” issues don’t inspire me, so I guess I’ll just have to stick to eZines like Skorch to satisfy my fat glossy mag jones.
9. It ain’t over until the fat chick sings!
Adele, a 20-year-old Brit, won legends of fans and a Grammy for best new artist this year. This soulful-voiced youn’un beat out the likes of the Jonas Brothers for the big award. Proof that you don’t have to be skinny to have your talent recognized!
Indie music star, Beth Ditto of Gossip, drops another CD AND a clothing line for the U.K.-based company Evans. Reviews are mixed, but there’s no denying that Beth Ditto’s fashion sense is fearless.
8. Even Barbie’s body isn’t perfect enough anymore! Top shoe designer Christian Louboutin complains that Barbie’s ankles are too fat for his shoe designs. And in a sad sign of the times, Barbie succumbs to plastic surgery in the name of fashion.
7. Fashion Runway features a designer who clearly has the big fashionista in mind. Although Qristyl Frazier didn’t make it to Bryant Park, she did win a place on our fashion radar and at New York City’ 2009 Full Figure Fashion Week. Check out her eStore featuring designs for women between size 10 and 24.
6. Don’t leave home without your library cards. Some of our favorite big girls and fatties came out with books to make you laugh, to make you cry, and to rethink your whole way of thinking. If you haven’t already, check out Crystal Renn’s Hungry; Valerie Frankel’s Thin is the New Happy; and Kate Harding’s Lessons from the Fat-O-Sphere.
Read More »
Filed in: Entertainment, Miscellanous, Plus-Size
October 2009 Marie Claire
I loathed the new direction Marie Claire magazine took about four years ago and I cancelled my subscription soon after. Before the magazine became obnoxious, elitist, and Elle magazine lite, it was an enjoyable magazine that wrote about beauty, fashion, celebrity, culture, and women’s issues (health, politics, body image, etc…) without making the reader feel out of touch. However, like a bad yet well-endowed ex-lover, MC comes around to tempt me. And, sometimes I bite. This time, it was the excellent October 2009 issue with the Drew Barrymore and Ellen Page on the cover. (They are such an adorable couple. Don’t you just want to be friends with Drew? She is totes a friend in my head but I digress.)
Back-to-back in the middle of the issue are two really sad stories about weight, size, and accepting one’s body. The first is an investigative story about a country in African called Mauritania, where women are Forced to Be Fat because it is the desired look. The second story is an even longer investigative piece about fake plastic surgeons, and the women who have been scarred trying to achieve some kind of warped standard of beauty. This article duo was really a one-two punch of just accepting what your Mama gave you.
In Forced to Be Fat, society appreciates stretch marks, overweight and obese women like our United States’ society appreciates thighs that don’t touch and a six-pack abs. Girls as young as 7-years-old are forced into fattening huts, and are made to eat up to 16,000 calories a day and then lay still. If they vomit, move, or don’t eat, they are beaten. For awhile, the trend of fattening was starting to decrease as Western television from France seeped into their culture and into the capital city Nouakchott. Women were beginning to slim down, eat better, and live healthier and less oppressive lives until a 2008 military coup removed the democratically elected government and began a movement towards tradition. Funny how tradition always means women’s bodies being controlled by men or the government? But the story does have some positive glimpses of light. A 200-pound woman in the story is a sex object and being pursued by two men, something we never see in the media her. Also, some women are refusing to return to the fat tradition and choosing to appreciate the bodies they have. This doesn’t mean they want to be a size 0, 4, or six. The story ends with some young women looking at Western model, clucking their tongues, and complaining how the skinny thing “looks ill.” Then they flip to a page in that magazine with the model, and read a story on liposuction. According to MC, the laughed until the room shook. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could read a story about the latest diet or lose the fat scheme, and we all caved in (fat or skinny or in between) with laughter at the ridiculousness of altering our natural body shapes?
MC was just throwing out the self-acceptance gems left and right in the October issue. In the culture section, they praised Matt Damon for not being the handsome golden-boy like Brad Pitt or having the matinee idol looks of George Clooney. They praised him for his depth and ability to be everyman that makes him sexier than the likes of Pitt and Clooney on the second glance. MC also highly suggested we check out Gossip ’s (with the figuratively and literally larger than life lead singer Beth Ditto) newest CD, Music for Men. Finally, it was delving into the cover story on Barrymore (I love her) and Page that sealed the deal for me. I may have to re-up my subscription. They let the women be themselves in the story, complete with swearing and Barrymore admitting to having a bit of a girl crush on Page. Barrymore confesses that during costume fittings the women in the film discusses how to be more comfortable with their bodies.
Barrymore says some of the most brilliant things that all women and girls need to hear: “Ellen has such a beautiful body; and I personally battled with my own body image for years. I used to tell myself, You can’t wear anything sleeveless or strapless. And all of a sudden I was like, What if I just didn’t send such negative messages to my brain and said, wear it and enjoy it? And now I’m more comfortable in clothes than ever.” (Ellen Page chimes in reassuringly and says that type of openness is sexy.) Drew continues: “And it’s so screwed up for girls to think, Oh, because I don’t have the cookie-cutter model body, it must mean I don’t have the right body shape. And I love model bodies, but I just want women to embrace several body shapes.” (After reading that quote, I wanted to give up my heterosexuality and marry Drew. lol.)
The icing on the cake was the last article in the magazine–a personal essay by a woman who has been struggling for years to lose the “last five” pounds. She admits that to give up that quest is like admitting that her body is perfect, and she is convinced that it isn’t. The essay is further proof that our bodies know what is right for us; diets don’t work; and that some women and men have some mild form of body dysmorphia.
Based on this issue alone, I am almost tempted to get a new subscription since magazine subscription rates are dropping due to the recession. But like with the bad ex-lover, I’ll just have to wait and see.
Filed in: Entertainment, Fat Positive
Last night, before we went to bed, my husband was flipping through the TV stations until he paused on a new video by Beyonce. (Insert big “no kidding” right here.) The video was for a song called “Ego,” which is about her man having a big dick. Ewww. Please spare me. I don’t want to think about Jay Z and his manily paraphenelia. But it wasn’t the allusions to Jay’s extra large penis that got my hackles up, it was the video itself. It featured Beyonce, yet again, in a leotard designed to flatter her shapely booty and long legs gyrating and grabbing her breasts. Really, Beyonce? Again?
Beyonce’s Ego
Her last three videos–Ego, Single Ladies, and Diva–all feature similar outfits and dance moves. Beyonce dancing in stilettos and a bathing suit fascimile is the stuff made for teen boys (and some teen girls) wet dreams. She’s not particularly graceful on heels or much of a talented dancer, so her moves come off more trashy than sexy. There’s no seduction or allure. It’s basically booty/pussy on a plate. Remember back when Beyonce wore more clothes, had more sophisticated dance moves, and had an air of Grrl power? Back when her sheer drive and body acceptance almost made her a hero to tween and teen girls. Where has that Beyonce gone?
Beyonce is a talented performer. Ms. B has turned Beyonce into a brand. She sang for the president of the United States for goodness sake. So why keep resorting to the cheesy, exploitive videos. As I used to comment about rappers Foxxy Brown and Lil Kim, you don’t have to be the ‘ho in your own video. I find it almost degrading. Beyonce is much more than a rump shaker, and music videos can be much more than just a platform for rump shaking. Beyonce made it this far being coy with her ass-shaking, and now it is just vulgar (and over exposed). C’mon, B, little girls are looking up to you. Go back to your roots and let them know that there is more to creating and sustaining a career than what one has jiggling in her trunk.
Thank you,
a concerned Mom of two daughters
Filed in: Entertainment, Miscellanous
Rakisha White